the inside job
BY KIMBER CHIN
Here are three quick ways to quit negative self-talk. Why does this matter? Like our phones and Alexa, our mind is always listening.
When we say things like “I finally got around to doing this” or “I’m not great at public speaking but I managed to give a decent presentation today” our brain hears “I procrastinate” and “I don’t have faith in my abilities.”
You may have mastered the art of kicking the negative self-talk habit, but have you mastered limiting these indirect statements? They are the exact opposite of rooting for yourself and believing the best.
So let’s jump in, here are three quick strategies to help counter negative self-talk:
- Awareness – Start by noticing and becoming aware of your negative self-talk patterns. Do you do it with others, with superiors, your family, or only in your head? When you catch yourself, consciously challenge those thoughts by questioning their validity and accuracy. What else could be true here that is a more realistic and positive view?
- Reframe – Reframing involves consciously changing your perspective on a situation or thought. Instead of dwelling on the negative or critical aspects, could you find alternative interpretations that are also true? Looking for the silver lining and the additional truths can help you shift your focus towards more positive and productive thoughts.
- Compassion – Treat yourself with kindness and understanding. As a recovering perfectionist, this was a challenge for me! Replacing self-criticism with self-compassion sets new neural pathways that pave the way for better habits. Acknowledge that you are doing the best you can with what you know. Everyone makes mistakes and faces challenges, and it’s okay to have imperfections. Treat yourself with the same kindness you would offer a friend!
These steps are simple but not easy. I get it. Just remember it doesn’t need to be perfect, practice makes permanent.
I’d love to hear your favorite ways to overcome negative self-talk. Comment below and let’s chat!
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